Open Letter. Why wait!

Dear Person-purchasing-express-card-to-avoid-waiting-in-line-at-Theme-park,

I applaud you. While the rest of the world save up to visit a theme park to have fun once every 250 days, there a few, quite a few who don’t even consider saving up to go the theme park. Amongst the ones that do visit a theme park, there are a few who pick and choose what they can afford to churn out memories from, others don’t have to choose and can visit every ride offered, eat from any outlet available to relish their time.

But I’m not in awe of them. I’m in awe of you. You, who can manage to not only pay four times the price to go through all the rides available, you also manage to do it without waiting in line.

You deserve better than waiting in line. Of Course! You’ve worked hard and have been living like a rich person right before entering the theme park. You are entitled to go around the theme park like the rich kid in the yard who gets the turn because he comes in a car to school.

You don’t deserve to stay dry and wet and dry and wet and stay more dry than wet in a theme park. You’ve paid more to stay more wet than dry. Again and again and again! Waiting is for peasants. You don’t have to deal with telling your friends, “Wait for me! Let this couple go. We’ll go together…”

I applaud the fact that you can go down the same water ride as many times you can and hence make it like an appliance in your house. The best thing about the express card is that you get a different colour wrist band. You don’t deserve to be amongst equals. Who are these villagers who dare to expect you to wear the same colour wrist band. Who do they think you are?
Don’t let them bother your fun and enjoyment. While we chose between a full meal or a beverage and more rides, you are entitled to having all of it.

In fact I think you’ve had enough. You should not be a subject to vicious eyes filled with wrath fall upon your tender loins… errr (scratch that) fall upon your back. You should have a theme park that only you could afford to go to. People who wait in line should not be even in your eye-sight so that you can bask in the stature that you are truly entitled to.

Your’s Sincerely,

Asticketh Uptheeass


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