Unwanted hype to make a point…

Have you ever began reading a paragraph and made up your mind about what the write up is about. There’s a comedy fest happening and I would want to make a point but my point isn’t too strong. So here’s the deal, I’m going to write about the comics that are going to be there at this fest. Some of them I have no clue about.  Lets see how this goes.

Aakash Mehta – He can seamlessly mix Gujarati and English. His videos are evident of it.
Aamer Peeran – Tesla. Goes with his gut and goes big. Tough looking soft guy.
Abbas Momim – I’ve met him just once and he seems to be the guy who knows about the right things happening in Comedy. Or that should happen, ideally.
Aditya Shridhar – Comedy Nerd and knows who were the greats.
Ahmad Ashik – Milke Khushi Hogi, I hope.
Ahmed Shariff – New Shariff in Town. Strong Views. He can get your attention and hold it just with the audibility of his voice.
Ajay Samson – Feel good guy who is insane with voices and characters while doing his stand up.
Alick Bailey – I will look forward to meeting you, Alick.
Anand Rathnam – Confident, thinker and always fun to have chai with.
Angad Singh Ranyal – Kaun Nahi Jaanta. Satsriyakal.
Anurag Godugu – Let’s see how this goes.
Anusha Choudhary – Hi, I’m Shunky Chugani.
Arun Govada – Grounded, visionary and super supportive for the comics around him and also for comics in other cities.
Ashwin Alphonso – Hi man! What’s up?
Ashwin Nair – Super sweet guy. Eager to learn. Once he introduced me on stage as Classical, Freestyle Zumba Dancer.
Atul Khatri – The first comic that I met and spoke with after his show who suggested to watch every comic and see and learn all the time.
Avinash Agarwal – Phir milenge Zaroor.
Avinash Ghosh – You meet him at a coffee shop and it will seem that he is the owner of the coffee shop. Something that’s very authoritative about him.
Azeem Banatwala – Super Computer with Algorithms always being updated, in the context of Comedy.
Bhavneet Singh – This guy is crazy cool to hang out with and we could talk for hours. Before one of us would fall asleep out of dehydration. It’s never happened, although it can.
Brian Aylward – Looking forward.
Chirag Panjwani – The only other Sindhi Comic who is as short as I am.
Danish Sait – The one and only. Kaun Nahi Jaanta!
Darius Sunawala – Everytime Darius is in the house there can’t be a dull moment. Each time I meet him, the conversation has been memorable.
Dattaprasad Godbole – I’ve envied guys like Dattaprasad who understand and very well know what they are talking about. One of the intelligent comics.
Deepak Chandran – Milenge!
Diptarko Ghosh – He’s funny when sober and fun when he’s had a drink or two.
Hriday Ranjan – Smart bhoy.
Jinx Yeo – I’m glad I got shortlisted for Masala Mayhem Comedy Fest.
Kanan Gill – Invests in the conversation that he has with you and super fun to hang out with when not being mobbed after a show.
Kaneez Surka – Improv ki Mallika.
Kjeld Sreshth – Mera dost, Mera bhai. One of the guys who if you make him laugh, his laugh will make you feel good. (Try it!)
Kritarth Srinivasan – A force to reckon with. The most common line we use is, Tu Best Hai.
Kunal Rao – The conversations we’ve had whenever I’ve met Kunal has been helpful in writing.
Mahesh Bolisetti – He knows Magic and he is someone you should dance with after a show.
Manas Tayal – Namaste!
Max Mystel – I’m already intimidated by the name.
Mayank Parakh – We shall talk soon.
Mukesh Manjunath – When he has his nights you will remember the guy, super sweet and maaza aata baat karne main.
Naveed Mahbub – I would have remembered if we would have had a conversation.
Naveen Richard – One of the most committed and well defined comics. He will surprise you. Even though you think you know him, he will surprise you.
Navin Kumar – Somoene who is super comfortable about who he is and always is looking ahead of the curve.
Neelaksh Mathur – Well behaved guy who is super comfortable on stage and talks to you whole heartedly.
Nishant Suri – Animated on stage and someone who lives up to the name of Suri Sahab ka ladka.
Nishant Tanwar – One of the first live stand up comics I watched.
Nitin Gupta – His name precedes him.
Pooja Vijay Ramamurthi – Someone I met a long time ago at an open mic in the audience when she got up on stage she got everyone. I was pleasantly surprised.
Praveen Kumar – Prolific, mentor and one of the sweetest people you’ll meet in any walk of life.
Pushkar Bendre – Hi there!
Rahul Dua – Hello to you too..
Rajashekhar Mamidanna – Bade Bhiya. He’s so pleasant to hang around and watch. He’s like a chacha ji that I’d like to meet.
Rohan Dias – He’s ekdum jhakaas and is super smart.
Rohit Swain – He looks like he made it to the state level cricket team. Each time I met him the thought came to me.
Rueben Kaduskar – Someone who I met just once and is super accomodative.
S Aravind – Prolific and macha…
Saad Khan – I’ve never had a word with him so far.
Sahil Shah – Kaun nahi Jaanta inko.
Saikiran Rayaprolu – Very hardworking and presentable on stage.
Sandesh Johnny – Ek baar bhi mulakaat nahi hui.
Sanjay Manaktala – A mentor, your story about Bill Cosby can’t be forgotten by me.
Sapan Verma – Kaun Nahi Jaanta. Lekin Sapan Verma, mujhe nahi jaanta
Sejal Bhat – Dark Comic. You think she’ll say something nice and she comes up with something that leaves your jaw open.
Shadab Aziz – Very Freindly Guy. We had a Bangalore Vs Hyderabad comedy show off and they played really well.
Shrirupa Sengupta – She has the hands of maturity and the voice of a child and the eyes of a Bengalan
Shunky Chugani – Kaun hai yeh!
Shyam Tenali – Trying hard not to do a reference to a comic book that I read in my teens. You know what I’m talking about.
Siddharth Banerjee – Very Witty writer and super helpful to the comics around him.
Sneha Suhas – She’s Bangalore’s very own diva.
Somanath Padhy – One of the best guys to hang out with for writing. Epic burn moments keep happening around him.
Sonali Thakker – Met a few times, watched her on TV and bas utna hi.
Sorabh Pant – I’ve watched him, admired his energy and bought his book. Not in that order.
Suhas Navrathna – One of the strong solid comics that takes stage and keeps the audience’s attention.
Suman Kumar – Author, Writer, Photographer, Stay at Home Dad and super expressive.
Sumit Anand – I’m sure if we were in the school, he’d bully me but banda accha hai.
Sumukhi Suresh – Kya bataun? Inke baare main toh you know better.
Sundeep Rao – A beast of a man on stage and on the prowl off stage.
Toby Thomas – Is baar zaroor milengey
Umesh Somani – Someone who looks like he fluctutates between, don’t mess with me and I’m jolly good ji.
Utsav Chakraborty – There isn’t a dull moment if this person is in the vicinity. Ekdum Paagal hai
V Shridhar – Smart Word Play and Plays with Smart Words.
Vamsidhar Bhogaraju – The most expressive funny guy on stage, when he is on stage. Actor and brilliant with characters.
Vasu Primlani – Aware about the environment and pretty honest about what she feels. Muh pe bold deti hai.
Vikram Poddar – Intellecual conversations are in order and his humor goes across corporate borders. (Yeah!)
Vivek Muralidharan – Good host for a party. The go to guy when he’s incharge and super fun.
Yash Bajaj – Is baar kuch toh hoga….

Over 80 Comedians.
Over 16 Days.
Masala Mayhem Comedy Festival
Get your tickets now! http://www.masalamayhem.com/buytickets

Bangalore cyclist lands up in Hospital

Cyclist Shunky Chugani was recently rushed to a hospital when he took on someone he shouldn’t have taken on. It was a Wednesday evening and Shunky who uses a cycle as his primary mode of transport was returning home after a day of work and attending an open mic session at Bangalore’s very first open mic, Urban Solace, thinking about the trailer of Kapoor and Sons and how he is in the trailer, wondering if he can be seen in the movie.

He was cycling along the left side of the road cautiously and quietly. Suddenly this, white swift begins to honk. Shunky slowly raises his right hand to indicate that he has no place to go, and that the driver would have to overtake him on the right side.

The driver speeds ahead, stops the car and gets out the car and begins to yell.  Shunky started to explain that he had no place to go and that he was riding the cycle as close to the pavement as possible and that the honking at a cyclist is uncalled for.

The driver started abusing Shunky to which, Shunky in turn picked up his cycle and threw it on the driver. He fell down and broke his crown and Jill came tumbling after. No! Sorry, wrong train of thought.

He went up the hill to fetch…Oops. Still wrong train!

Shunky was livid at the driver for firstly honking at him and secondly to abuse him when he stood his ground. The driver got up and wanted to carry his Swift to throw on Shunky but he could barely move the car’s body as he tried to lift it up.

The driver then took one good look and decided that he can be beaten to pulp just by his bare hands. He catches hold of Shunky and begins to punch him making him fall on the ground like he was a henchman. The driver then kicks Shunky and he lay unconscious. As soon as that happened, all the money that he was carrying at that point began to float in the air. All 21 rupees!

A blackout and fade in, standing outside CMH hospital, made Shunky realize that he’s playing way too many video games.

Also Shunky had this thought, that if it’s wrong to cycle on the footpaths of Bangalore, it’s inhuman to honk at a cyclist.

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Innocent Shunky Chugani attaches the wrong photo to the blog of him on the cycle. But he was on the side of the road. I swear!

It’s not even my cycle – The HandleBards

On April 2015, a group of actors came down from the UK to BangaloreThe HandleBards, travel in UK on cycles and perform Shakespeare with slapstick. They’re very Monty Python & they’re very good.

They came to Bangalore and wanted to use a cycle on stage and did not have one because of logic. They’re from UK, they’re in Bangalore and doesn’t make sense to carry a cycle to another country. I had a cycle that was my primary mode of transport for a while in the city, but I hadn’t used it for over a year. They used on stage and it was amazing to watch them on stage.

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That’s them on stage, doing Macbeth!      (and that’s my cycle)

Let me give you a back story of the cycle. It’s not even my own cycle. I borrowed it from a friend to use to change not just jobs but fields of work, twice. This cycle got me from tech support, to copy writing, to working at a theatre and doing stand up. It got stolen once and later I found it. It’s been my partner in so many thoughts. I hadn’t used it for a year because I started to ride an electric bike and the cycle was used at the theatre for a while to run for odd errands. It stayed in the Theatre for a year.

A week ago, I decided to get my cycle fixed. I did not intend for it to be in the same week that were coming back to Bangalore. I got the cycle repaired. I mean I had the rear tyre changed, the chain replaced, the oiling done and got the cycle fixed.

The fist time I take the cycle out to go to an open mic in over a year. I reach Koramangla and just outside Coffee on Canvas, I get the instinct to take the inner route and not the main road to go to Claytopia, the venue for open mic. And at that junction who do I bump into, but The HandleBards, on the cycle that they used onstage when they were first came last year that was being used for the first time after it was on stage. Now to think about it that if I hadn’t taken that left I would have missed this moment.

Now this might not look like a huge co-incidence to you but I was getting this signal from the universe that I should not smoke up. Because if I was under influence and this would have happened, I would have taken off running and would not know what to do.

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What if we got our clothes at Birth

I used to wonder a lot as a child. I’m now wondering if I was high when I was a child. I’d get these  ideas, during the time when I’d dream that maybe I have some super power.

I used to wonder that what if the Divine powers that run the universe got together and decided that we will send clothes of babies that are born till death. So that  who are on earth will know how many stages they will see before they die. Also you can plan in advance knowing how tall, fat, bulky your child is going to be.

I’m pretty sure that would make it awesome. Just by the simple analogy that as a child when you Mother says you get only 2 aloo parathas, you get prepared to enjoy those two and you enjoy them to the fullest. Going by that logic, you would see the number of people who would live content.

It would give people also the knowledge to gather the strength to be happy for others. If you would truly believe what you were sent for, then you would work towards it. If this doesn’t work then worst case scenario we would live in world where we’re jealous, have hatred for others and mostly bitching about others, which is what we’re already living in so… Yeah!

I know I’m treading in grey areas in the aspect that people would be more chained to their destinies than they already are but I think if God would give people a reason to live it would be awesome to give them that like a maths paper.

Given :
Clothes till age: 46
: Chemist
Height: 5’8
Weight: Variable, over-weight towards the end of life cycle, with sudden drop in weight
Please explore life to the fullest!
Good luck!

Questions…

Have you ever walked into an empty Elevator and sang “Hello” from Lionel Richie for 8 floors at the top of your voice? Have you thought about the time when you first walked into a skyscraper? Do you know 12 floors high is not a skyscraper? Do ever feel like you are weird and none of the people that you know do the things you do? How long ago was it when you ran so hard that you almost fainted and were out of breath for minutes? Do you sometimes understand the joke ahead of others and laugh ahead of time before they join in? Do you look at a stunt that you see on Tv and say “I could really do that”?

Do you smile when you look at an old person still brisk and living with a smile? Don’t you think people who judge are ones who are either insecure or insufficient, incapable or one of those words that have the prefix “in”? Do you ever pick up something with your toes or reach out for something with a scalpel or an umbrella and think you would do better than others around you in survival? Do you ever bad dance? Do you ever dance all by yourself and imagine a huge crowd around you? Do you get teary eyed in the movies?

Do you get afraid of the dark? Don’t you walk sometimes just for the heck of it and come back refreshed? Does it ever occur to you that universal things like, dance, music, culture, love, respect, competition, problems, change, life, death has been going on for centuries and will go on for centuries? Have you ever felt like giving something away and not expect anything in return? Are you intimidated, nervous scared to talk to a girl? Have you ever opened a door for a lady or an elderly person? Have you ever given your own seat to a woman or elderly person, when you are on the bus? Does rain make you smile? Does it make you want to walk with the person you love? Have you thought that your kids will know and see much more than you ever will? Do you see people in different circles of society? Do you sometimes find energy in memories? Do you sometimes fuel yourself with memories and the feelings that is inside you? Have you ever danced with someone and felt comfortable and close? Do you sometimes skip bath on a holiday? Do you keep deadlines for yourself to do a certain something and then let them go by as you wave? Have you ever wanted to have someone to talk all night long? Has it crossed your mind that sometimes just being with someone makes everything so bright? Have you ever felt neglected?

Have you worked harder than you should so that someone you love can take rest? Have you smiled at someone when they offer you something for what you’ve done? Do you play with kids and let them win and see their emphatic reactions? Do you believe deep down, that people come in all shapes and sizes and are all beautiful? Have you ever seen a couple and thought about your future? Are these questions getting out of hand? Did you agree on any one of them? Should I have stopped at the question about the rain making you smile? Could you tell me how many questions are in here?